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Welcome, boys and girls. Snarky is back with some very delayed, but still juicy, gossip. You've been waiting long enough, so let's get started.
If you're male and you live in Pleasantview, you're probably having a bad day.
165 Sim Lane - Goth The day started off looking good for Mortimer Goth because he was finally ditching (er, marrying off) his darling daughter Cassandra. Mortimer feared he would not live to see the day that Cassandra rode off into the sunset of marital bliss. And thanks to Don Lothario, Morty will have to live a little bit longer.
165 Sim Lane - Goth The late summer sun did nothing to warm Don Lothario's cold feet. As Cassandra was poised to slip the ring on his finger, Don literally made a run for it, leaving a shocked and embarrassed bride in his wake.
165 Sim Lane - Goth What do you do when your groom leaves you at the altar? If you've dreamed about nothing but marriage and babies your entire life, you have a nervous breakdown! It's a good thing Cassandra's father is rich because there will be therapy bills on top of all those wedding expenses.
165 Sim Lane - Goth Alexander: Maybe you could hide out on Saturn until everyone forgets that Don jilted you.
215 Sim Lane - Pleasant Don't be fooled here. Daniel Pleasant isn't role-playing with his wife. That's Kaylynn, the maid.
215 Sim Lane - Pleasant It looks like Daniel is having a really good day, but all you-know-what is about to break loose. His wife Mary-Sue is outside having a nervous breakdown because she got demoted at work. Little does she know, she's been demoted in the bedroom as well as the boardroom.
215 Sim Lane - Pleasant Angry women seem to follow Daniel wherever he goes. Daniel hopes the slapfest between his twin daughters, Angela and Lilith, will take Mary-Sue's mind off of his own indiscretion. Don't count on it, Dan!
170 Main Street - Caliente Don, you really know how to make an exit. You should have stuck around because I hear the Caliente girls make a killer omelette. Or was that what the late Skip Broke said about his wife Brandi?
55 Woodland Drive - Broke And speaking of Brandi Broke...
Not even the young men of Pleasantview can catch a break today. As soon as Dustin steps off the bus, his mom lays into him about his grades.
55 Woodland Drive - Broke Congratualations to Beau Broke on celebrating his birthday. Beau, you're possibly the only male in Pleasantview to have a decent day, but I will have to deduct points for the pink pajamas.
215 Sim Lane - Pleasant I still have more houses to visit in Pleasantview. Will the men's luck turn around? I guess the look on Cassandra's face shows that the women of Pleasantview haven't had that great of a day either. Cass, if you want to start up a Pleasantview chapter of the She-Woman Man-Hater's Club, just look over your shoulder for your first recruit!
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